Gregorio was bragging to Tiborcio one day,

“You know, I know everyone. Just name someone, anyone, and I know them.”

Tired of his boasting, Tiborcio called his bluff, “OK, Gregorio, how about Tom Cruise?”

“Sure, yes, Tom and I are old friends, and I can prove it” Gregorio said.

Gregorio and Tiborcio fly out to Hollywood and knock on Tom Cruise’s door.

And sure enough, Tom Cruise shouts : “Hey Gregorio my friend! Great to see you! You and your friends come right in and join me for lunch!”

…Although impressed, Tiborcio is still skeptical.

After they leave Cruise’s house, he tells Gregorio that he thinks Gregorio knowing Cruise was “Just lucky”.

“No, no, just name anyone else” Gregorio says.

…”President Trump”, Tiborcio quickly retorts.

…”Yes”, Gregorio says, “I know him.”

And off they go. At the White House, President Trump spots Gregorio on the tour and motions him, saying, : “Gregorio, what a surprise, I was just on my way to a meeting, but you and your friend come on in and let’s have a cup of coffee first and catch up”.

Well, Tiborcio is much shaken by now, but still not totally convinced.

After they leave the White House grounds, he implores him to well name anyone else.

“The Pope,” Tiborcio replies.

…”Sure!” says Gregorio, “My folks are from Italy and I’ve known the Pope a long time”.

Gregorio and Gregorio are assembled with the masses in Vatican Square when Gregorio says, “This will never work. I can’t catch the Pope’s eye among all these people. Tell you what, I know all the guards so let me just go upstairs and I’ll come out on the balcony with the Pope.”

And he disappears into the crowd headed toward the Vatican.. Sure enough, half an hour later Gregorio emerges with the Pope on the balcony.

But by the time Gregorio returns, he finds that Tiborcio has had a heart attack and is surrounded by paramedics.

Working his way to Tiborcio’s side, Gregorio asks him, “What happened?”

Tiborcio looks up and says,

“I was doing fine until you and the pope came out on the balcony and the Italian man next to me said, “Who’s that on the balcony with Gregorio?”

P.S. – No offense. This is only a fictional story.